The Full Moon Diaries: Quick Study
by Kitsune Heart
Summary: "Lili and I got talking, you see, and she had this great idea, so I thought I'd try it out." Artemis grinned. An idea from Lili? The last time Holly had come home with one of those, they'd both been too exhausted to leave the house that weekend. "Right, Lili?" Holly said, looking over her shoulder. VERY important note: Read the author's note first.


**If you're not paying attention to this author's note and instead skipping to the story, you're going to get very angry.**

**Due to disagreements I have with this site's terms of use and business practices (along with it's tolerance of actually laughably ineffective censors), I have relegated Fanfiction dot net to final-tier update status, which means I only upload my stories here about once a month, and less and less as time goes by. So anyone trying to keep up with my writing is way behind if they stay here.**

**The best way to keep up with my updates is to join my e-mail list. Send an e-mail to "kitsuneheartwriting********+subscribeATgmail#****com". (Replace the pound sign with a period and the AT with the actual at sign, of course.) You can also keep track of me at the Archive of Our Own, which is my preference for the exodus of this fandom. The waitlist is long, but worth the wait.**

**If you ignored that note and kepr reading, again, you're going to get angry in about five minutes. Too bad!**

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**The Full Moon Diaries**

**Chapter 9: Quick Study**

Quick Study

With the minor improper meshing of their schedules, it was inevitable that Artemis occasionally had to leave Holly asleep in his bed in the morning, the major looking angelic even as she murmured over the loss of his warmth. Similarly, he would arrive home early on these days, his hours shifted in direct proportion to his early arrival. During these times, he took the effort to tidy up the house (an act he would have considered too urbane for his own hands only months before) and "set the mood" before Holly arrived. Artemis was a bit better at this than most males, having advanced from the candles-as-romance stage.

No, nothing so obvious as candles. Not even the fairy equivalent of "Let's Get It On" (which, Artemis was horrified to learn, was sung by a dwarf distantly related to Mulch Diggums). He simply...cleared the way. Every possible location for a tryst was put in perfect readiness, with all the available cushions fluffed up (gods, if Foaly only knew what had been done with those decorative couch pillows, he would never look at Artemis straight again), each room sprayed with an odor-eliminator (nothing ruined the mood more than Holly saying, with her head pressed hard the carpet, that it smelled a lot like JayJay), and the lights programmed to be dimmed if turned on. Then, of course, he readied himself: freshly showered, clean-shaven, and bolstered with a light snack, to give him the energy necessary to keep up with his strong lady. Months together and there was still such a disparity in their stamina, and so many wonderful things to try if he could just keep going.

It seemed, however, he would not be allowed to experiment this night.

"Lili...what?" Artemis said flatly.

On the other end of the cell network, Holly sighed. "She just had a bad breakup—"

"We are talking of Lili Frond, correct?" Artemis interrupted. "How does she equate a one-night-stand with a 'bad breakup'?"

"Artemis!" Holly snapped. "Will you...ugh." There was a rustle of hair as Holly shook her head. "Whatever. She and I are going out for a girl's night. Don't wait up for me, I'll probably sleep at the Mansion tonight."

Artemis scowled. "And why will you not just come back here?"

The phone crackled as Holly sniffed loudly and indignantly. "I think you need a night alone every so often. You're getting...presumptuous."

Artemis raised an eyebrow, even though he knew his lover could not see the gesture. "'Getting'?"

The line went abruptly dead.

Artemis gaped at his phone a moment before sliding it closed, pocketing it, and shrugging. At least he'd got in the last word.

To be fair to the man, Artemis had spent a handful of nights without his lover since the night they first shared pleasures. He found them...dull. Even a night with Holly but without sex was preferable to a night alone.

He considered calling to see if Trouble would also be available for an evening's entertainment (he had found himself tolerating the man, in recent weeks, and Holly strongly encouraged him whenever he seemed to be developing a friendship), but knew the elf would be on his own mission tonight. One involving a thick-tipped black marker and enough cheap ale to make his self-denial semi-plausible. Foaly was also an option, but for the fact that Artemis had already left the centaur manning the Ops booth, and he loathed returning to the Plaza, even for company. His family was on vacation, so the possibility of chatting with them was also out, since he was not allowed to communicate on unsecured lines.

Artemis realized something with a shock: he had become a..._social_ creature. In years previous, he would have met a night alone with a grateful sigh, one of Butler's expertly prepared cups of tea, and a book large enough to crush most purse-dwelling canines. Well...he could certainly do so now. A Bujold omnibus was located, the tea was passable for his own preparation, but the sigh was rather more a yawn, his choice of reading in bed the likely culprit. A sort of Pavlovian response, as he had hitherto only used this bed for two things, and the preferable activity was, apparently, not happening tonight.

He must have dozed off. Sometime later, he awoke as the mattress shifted under the slight weight of a well-maintained body. His felt significantly less cared-for as he sat up, blinking back sleep, the book slide down his bare chest. "Holly?" he inquired blearily.

Her soft face swam into view, the duplicitous eyes sparking delightfully. "Hey there, sleepyhead."

Artemis felt that such a title lacked a lot of his accustomed dignity, but one did not argue with a lover too much. "I was under the impression that you wouldn't be joining me tonight."

"Oh...well..." Holly hedged, tugging at the single, thin blue sheet Artemis had used to cover himself, easing it an inch down his torso, revealing a sparse swath of chest hair. "Lili and I got talking, you see, and she had this _great_ idea, so I thought I'd try it out."

Artemis grinned. An idea from Lili? The last time Holly had come home with one of those, they'd both been too exhausted to leave the house that weekend.

"Right, Lili?" Holly said, looking over her shoulder.

Artemis's eyes nearly popped out as a figure somewhat thinner than Holly's (only due to a lack in equal musculature) leaned around the first woman, her arm circling the redhead's waist until she seemed to wrap the major up inescapably, her chin resting on her coworkers's shoulder. "Yep. And you were right, boss," she said, scrunching up her nose as she smiled, showing off full red lips and perfect teeth. "He _does_ look cuter when he's sleeping. Imagine that."

Artemis gaped. In most surprising situations, he could recover quickly, but awaking to unfamiliar women in his bed was not something he was used to. It was certainly nothing Butler had prepared him for (except perhaps an admonition to scream, because of that lady-assassin thing). Perhaps Trouble would have taken the event in stride, but Artemis was not a playboy, and he had mixed reactions. Both just so happened to focus on his genitals. Very soon, he would either piss himself or grow very...uncomfortable.

"Well?" Lili said impatiently. She pinched Holly's bare midriff, earning a yelp and glare for her impertinence. "Don't leave him like that. Poor boy looks about ready to run, and we don't want that, do we?"

"Not at all," Holly agreed, disentangling herself from the blond. She began to crawl up the large bed, smooth skin whispering on the silken sheets. Each time her hand came down, she took a fistful of sheets, dragging them off Artemis's body inch-by-inch.

Artemis's hormones ordered him to focus on Holly, and they were mostly successful. She had put on a little makeup tonight, and her blue eyeshadow matched his eye perfectly, making the wickedness inherited from him all too noticeable. Lip gloss brought attention to her heavenly mouth, already slightly open, the tip of her tongue darting out to taste the sugar in the gel and further moisten the soft skin, making them look so wet that he could simply slide inside without an effort. Then his eyes drifted down Holly's face to find her criminally low-cut shirt. A borrowed item, no doubt, along with the black pleated skirt and...oh, gods, it couldn't be...oh _gods_, they were. The most dangerous dual black spikes of stiletto-heeled boots he'd ever seen. Artemis was almost ashamed to find that he was responding to the outfit. It looked like something from a bad porno, but _damn_, it was working.

This he took in for the first several seconds. Then his eyes drifted beyond, to where Lili sat with her legs tucked up to her body, like a true queen surveying her native lands (which he supposed strange men's bedrooms were to her...). She met his eyes with no hesitation, and her lips—painted the same soft pink as Holly's, and likely done deliberately, as it made Artemis think of alternative means by which they could have shared the shades—curved as she watched her superior officer slowly exposing her young man. When the sheet was down enough to reveal Artemis's undergarments, Lili laughed and clasped her hands before her mouth. "Oh! Good boy, Fowl! Boxers! It's the only way to go, really."

Her voice finally seemed to snap Artemis from his shock. He backed away from Holly (if he'd had his wits about him, he would have taken the sheets with him, but instead exposed himself further) and looked about for some escape. Or the camera set up to record this cruel prank. "Holly, what are you _doing?_"

"Shh," Holly urged, pouncing to keep up with her prey. She placed a firm hand on his chest, rolling her eyes a little as she felt the hammering heart and rapid breathing beneath. "Calm down, love. It's all right." She straddled Artemis's lap, keeping him pinned to the bed, her breasts almost smothering him as she drew closer.

"What is going _on_, Holly?" Artemis snapped, momentarily immune to breasts.

"Well, it's like I said: Lili had an idea." Holly lifted her hand to Artemis's neck, her nails scratching his thin skin carefully "She's been with a lot more people than me, so she knows a _lot_ about sex, so...she thought maybe she could tutor me."

"_Tutor?"_ Artemis shrilled. "If you want pointers, ask her to write them down, don't..." Artemis flailed about with one hand, not daring to describe what was going on, in the very slim chance he misunderstood Holly's apparent invitation for the Frond to join them in bed.

"Oh, no no no!" Lili protested, alarmed in much the same style as a fashion designer coming across a pair of shoes that just wont _do_. "How would I know when she's doing something wrong? No, this requires hands-on instruction."

"Hands..." Artemis began, instantly petering out.

"Real-time, one-on-one," Holly confirmed. Then she winked. "Or maybe one-on-two...or would it be two-on-one?"

Artemis flicked his eyes to his mate again. He knew this was one of the biggest fantasies of the average men. He also knew Holly had an extremely short temper and a killer right hook. "Holly...I..."

"Stop," Holly chided, rubbing her palm along **[REDACTED]**

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WHAT!? What, you say? What is "redacted!?" What does that meeeeeean!?

It's the placeholder used in editing when material is censored. And it's my reminder to you to _read the damned author's notes first!_

A few months ago, a group of site users began an aggressive campaign against authors who posted MA materials. While Fanfiction dot net has technically disallowed MA material for some time, there has never been any teeth in these bans. A simple word filter would have caught most of my works, but they fail to do even that, likely because the ad revenue from MA material is still profit to them.

I decided, on my own terms, to remove my MA materials to protect the balance of my work, and replaced the chapters author's notes informing my readers of the move and how to keep up with my work elsewhere. I was hit...with a warning for posting author's notes. I appealed to site administration, in the hopes that they would allow the notes to stay up for the one week I was allowing my readers to catch up. The next day, I came home from work and found I could not access this site on my home Internet, but could do so on my phone's 3G. My IP address had been blocked.

This ban has since been lifted, but it has left me disgusted with Fanfiction dot net. Not only are they putting a limit on creativity, but they show no consideration for their users. As such, I am encouraging all my readers to abandon this site in favor of other fanfiction sources, such as the Archive of Our Own. I now only update my stories to this site once a month, and that will become less and less frequent as more of you sign up for my e-mail alerts. Keep up with the newest chapters by sending me an e-mail to **"kitsuneheartwriting********+subscribeATgmail#****com". **I will send you e-mails when new chapters are out.

I encourage all readers to get on the waitlist for an account with the Archive of Our Own. The waitlist is currently long, but the site is amazing, and completely free of censorship.

This story fragment will be up for a week before being removed. I'll keep doing this until the majority of my readers are migrated.

Abandon Fanfiction dot net and hurt them right where it hurts: the ad revenue.

...**[REDACTED]**


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